Thursday, July 16, 2009

In The Blank Pages

With all of the boxing up I have been doing, it has given me a chance to go through a few things. I'm sure that when the unpacking commences it will be in a more hurried rush to get everything in place at the new (hopefully) house. I haven't been tossing things to the bin, yet, as I am unsure of what we will need to make a new home, but some of packing has left me with a sense of nostalgia.
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Today I placed a few of my old journals and (my) poetry books into a pile to be added to the boxes I was working on, but as I was starting to place them inside their cardboard home, I hesitated. What was in these old books? Glancing through them it was some fond, some not so fond entries written from when I was much younger. Oh, the mind of a teenager!
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Reading a few of the pages, I quickly realized that in every book I have only two that are completely filled front to back. The rest are only partially done, waiting to be finished. But I can't. That is the past, and those memories need to stay with the blank pages following. Which got me to thinking earlier this evening...
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Everybody has a story. Some are lucky enough to tell those stories for others to know, but some never fill those pages of their life. Leaving an empty existence of forgotten tales and stories fading away through lasting family. I'm not saying that all people should write journals, but with my recent experience of keeping one for Fritz of his mostly daily activities, I have come to understand how important these lasting words can become. If I was to be non-existent tomorrow, I have a pleasing smile knowing that when Fritz is older he can read what I have put on paper for him and know how much he meant to me. The same holds true for my older journal books. Things forgotten as the years have past, but one sentence read, and all comes flooding back.
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But for some reason, the blank pages not written left me with a curious thinking. In all those old books, where only a few pages had words, what of the things left unwritten? Those I guess, are the private words left for me, and only for me.

6 comments:

Christina Lowry said...

I have all my old journals too. Some things make me cringe, but others hold wonderful memories and document my a different part of my life.

:)

jane said...

oh how i love how you write! i never kept journals and now i wish i had... happy weekend!

Maria Rose said...

I have started a journal for our little girl as well. I plan to keep it throughout her life and give it to her when she's an adult.

Sassy Scribbles said...

you wrote this "extra" beautifully,I couldn't agree more with everything you said about journals and how it can immortalize the time that's been. ^^

erin said...

I never kept a journal as a child or teenager, some days i think that was a good choice others i wonder why i didn't. as an adult i scrapbook and journal within those, scrapbooking simple day-to-day activities not just big trips and events and making sure i journal names, dates and in the third person so that one day at least part of my history continues on!!

..... Carmen said...

I used to write myself letters in my teens, and have kept all of them. I only have journals from when I went away on trips. I must be more of a letter writer because I have found as Grace is getting older, I am now writing her letters as well rather than filling in her journal. I'm glad you stopped to read some of what you wrote - it is always so interesting to reminisce!

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